The quote, below, came to me in an email.
"People who consider themselves victims of their circumstances will always remain victims unless they develop a greater vision for their lives." Stedman Graham -- Speaker, Author and Educator
Upon reading it I thought about how true this is. I am a survivor of childhood abuse and a survivor of a sever illness that could have taken my life and that caused a year of healing and small battles.
However, I feel this quote fits better with my childhood abuse.
I strongly believe that each of us are given different ways to deal with situations where we have been a victim. Some rebell against whomever has hurt them, especially children. Sadly, some don't know how to handle it and feel it's best to end their life than have to deal with the pain any longer. Some hide the truth and/or pretend it didn't happen. This is how I was brought up. We brushed everything under the rug and pretended it didn't exist. After HS, I tried leaving the situation, at home, and lived with my grandmother. Well the situation was still there. So after a year I moved out on my own. No, I wasn't around the abuser any longer but the aftermath of the abuse was still with me.
I was (and am) very lucky to have a boyfriend (and now husband of many years) that loved me even through my trying to deal with the hurt, anger, and hatred that I had bottled up within me. It wasn't until we were married and had two children that I finally sought out help and really realized the anger and hatred I had built up. See, growing up I was never allowed to be angry or hate anyone (espeically when one abuser was my grandfather and the other my mother) so I blocked those feelings. So in around about way I was still allowing myself to be a victim of the abusers even with one of them dead and having no contact with the other.
No, I will never be completely healed so that I don't have memories that cause the hurt and hatred to surface. But I do have God to help me forgive as many times as I need to. I am also following His lead in using my abuses and experiences to help others. With the help of my church family I have started a healing ministry. I can only hope and pray that through this ministry we can (with God's help) reach out to those that are hurting and let them know that it's ok to feel the pain and anger and hatred and help them deal with it so they don't remain a victim all their life.
I pray that you are not a victim of a past or even present circumstance. Please know that you are more than welcome to post your situation, in as much detail or little detail as you like, and I will keep you in my prayers so that God can lead you to healing and a happier life.
